• What’s This About

    While coaching swimming nothing would send the hair on the back of my neck standing more than the words ‘I CAN’T’. My internal scream would send out a louder ‘WHY NOT’. The interaction, the turbulence, provided a direction…head first into the fire. I feared that the ‘I CAN’T’, if not investigated, concretes itself into the safe harbor, the containment, of a lifelong ‘BREAKWALL’. The ‘WHY NOT’ is ‘THE BEYOND’, the battle cry, the direction, the salvaging effort. The metaphor is ageless, human.
    Going ‘BEYOND BREAKWALLS’ is living your life… ‘BBW’ is the encouragement.

    I am dedicating these efforts in support of 'The Brotherhood For The Fallen'

    They represent reverently, modestly, and humbly the individuals who chose a side, planted their heels, and met their final call. They are Hero’s, represented by Hero's. It's an incredible honor.
    Thanks for visiting, that too is an Honor...

‘Get up you son-of-a-bitch’

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Got a little beat up in the month of December, not one GOAL attained… I think I went backwards at a high rate of speed yet. It’s a bit difficult to admit. Definitely on the ropes if you look at the stats, the numbers, figures.


Look at that and we are done, ‘Put your money on another horse’. I say that like a threat…


December and November GOALS are on a 01 December post, none of which were reached.


So what do we do?


Be more reasonable? Set more attainable goals? Be more realistic with my life? Relax? Act my age? Give it up? Hang it up? What do I do?


What would you do? Would you continue? Would you listen to the advice? Would you finally admit the critics, the lemmings, were right about the direction your life should go? Would you listen to them as they tell you that you have what you need? Would you walk?


It is right there in black and white, spelled out, and it is not adding up because I am not putting out…


What do I do?



What do I do!


I have a swim to swim and a passion to build. It’s about getting back up especially when your backed up…right into the walls of your life. The direction is forward, no choice. A challenge has been embraced 24 months ago and we are living in it, wading in it, and making our way.


If we walk out now we walk out on our lives for the rest of our lives and settle,’This is how it is’. Negative.


We know the direction, we know intuitively in our SOUL it’s attainable and that is the problem. The certainty is in the SOUL, where there are no price-tags, pay grades, statistics, guarantees, there’s nothing tangible. We are afraid of the changes that need to take place, the effort, the lifetime of knots put into our ropes that need undoing. We are afraid of being made uncomfortable. We are afraid of the cold hard courage that needs to be mustered to break the routine, the chains.


The critics love it. They love watching another bleed, struggle, get beaten. They resent, they are jealous, they want you with them…they will share their misery. They hide…comfortably.


Fuck Them…


The little voice inside my SOUL muffles their ramblings, it’s just loud enough…




That’s right, ‘I have a swim to swim’…






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  • About Nial

    I fell a few times in the past few years that 'BBW' is a climb back, a rekindling of my Soul. The postings keep me 'tracking' in a passionate direction. I need that, Passion. The other piece that is so important to me, especially at this time in my life, is to somehow share the experience, the attitude, humor, pain... all things human. It's in this place we can relate and in certain moments...carry each other. I need that too.
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  • Swims Completed

    1. English Channel

    2. Strait of Gibraltar

    3. Manhattan Island

    4.Chicago Shoreline

    5. Chicago to Michigan

    6. Catalina Island